Sunday, November 13, 2011
So i had a post all ready to go....show u my new dresser i finally finished. I thought about doing a d-day post but thought....who's going to want to read the whinnings of some sad newly diagnosed diabetic.
Lets be honest, we pass by stuff all day long. Pink canned soup,shoes,pens,people collecting to find a cure for breast cancer. It should be important to me....I have breasts. I could become one of the many woman who will or have had breast cancer. But, I don't. I have been lucky not to have anyone in my family diagnosed with it. So,I walk by the collection, the cans of soup and the shoes and the pen and....I just walk on by.
So why should you care that today is national diabetes awareness day. Unless, it has some how crept its slimy little paws into your life.
For me it has. I try not to let it define me or control to many aspects of my life, but it does.
I am a mother, a wife and then a type 1 diabetic. That is where it ranks in my life. That is where it has to rank in order for me to be a mother and a wife and everything else I choose to be.
I wake up.... I test, I fix my breakfast and count my carbs then draw my insulin and shoot....then I test before the gym..... then i finish exercise and i test. I try to predict how it will affect my numbers later . I fix lunch count carbs, draw insulin and shoot. I over shoot and become to low and then correct and now i have over corrected and I need to add 1 more unit to my dinner draw. This time theirs a bonus shot. My long lasting..... I draw, let sit on counter for 30 minutes so it does not sting like hell and i shoot. Bed time ( i love bedtime) their is a magic fairy that sometimes visit me called pre-dawn phenom and she leaves me a present of high gi numbers in the morning...and then the day starts all over again.
The best part of all of the testing and shooting and 30 grams of carbs a meal is..... I still can not control it. It can take my sight, It could take my limbs or it could take my life. I choose none of the above, but i don't know if that is for me to decide.
I dont want pitty or an award .....I want a cure.
I want affordable meds.
I want Insurance companies to have to insure me.....Isnt that what insurance is for? The sick? They sure the hell did not mind my money for the last 15 years.
This is not my story. This is only a glimpse of who I am, but today, this is the story I tell and this is what I share with you.